We went camping last night with the youth group and some street kids. Car camping is awesome because you can bring anything you want and not have to worry about hiking it up a mountain with you. I think camping is such a great bonding experience because everyone gets gross from not taking showers and cozy in a stuffy tent at night. It rained a bit when we got there, but then it cleared up for the most part and was gorgeous when we woke up in the morning. I went to bed pretty early along with two other girls in my tent, and as I was laying there, I heard everyone else start singing worship songs. I totally wasn't expecting it, but it was pretty different to just sit and listen to worship and silently partake in it than it is to sing out loud. I just wondered at all the beautiful voices I heard that were making music to the heavens, and thought about how kids who live in suburban homes and kids who don't know where they're going to sleep each night can all worship the same, mighty, powerful, loving, gracious God of the universe. He unifies like nothing else I have experienced in my 20 years. I also gained a new sense of connection with street life; although while on a mountain, there were no showers, no easy waste relief, and no clean shelters, all of which are struggles someone who lives on the streets faces every day and night. I felt ashamed to feel so gross after one night of sleeping in a tent without a shower the next morning to wake me up, when some of my new friends probably haven't had showers in weeks. I have found that simple things are those that are most eye-opening. It's just that I haven't had the perspective to view them in a different manner other than my suburban, middle class, church eyes.
A couple days ago, we had a teaching time where our "assignment" was to go into a park and just absorb God's glory, and then we had to write down adjectives that came to us when we looked/heard/smelled/whatever. As I sat there, I saw a squirrel, which crept ever closer because I kept so still. It made me think of the fact that I probably seemed so entirely other to it, as God does to us, and yet when we come to Him, He blesses us and challenges us and loves us; for all that squirrel knew, I could have had a lifetime supply of food for it and its curiosity was about to pay off. Anyway, I couldn't just sit there and write a few words to describe everything I felt and was thinking, so I wrote a short poem. I didn't think it was finished when my half hour was up, but now I realize that I can't really add anything after the fact. Since I already shared it with everyone here, I figure I should just post it. Here it is:
For what is this racing heart if not to beat for You?
Blood pumped through these veins in Your perfect rhythm.
The cycle unfolds amidst curiosity, a search for something more.
Life begets life but You alone begot its meaning.
I perceive goodness because You told me it is so.
My eyes are being enlightened; oh, thank You, God.
Your victory, Your Son, this Jesus, my home.
